Untethered and (Dis)Connected: How to Return to Your Creative Path On Your Own Time

That crunch.

You know it. I know it. Everyone who has owned a ridiculously fragile electronic device that goes everywhere and is relied upon to do almost everything knows it.

The crunch that you hear when the screen hits the floor.

On Labor Day Monday Monday, I felt that sinking dread when my Apple Watch slipped from my fingers and fell face down on the tile.

For over two years, that little piece of wildly powerful technology has been securely fastened to my body. It’s own tracking data will show you that I would wear it for well over 12 hours per day. And, if you don’t have access to the app, you can see it in the pale strip on my arm where the freckles have faded after years under cover.

Now it’s Thursday, and though I am fully clothed, I feel naked. 

I have no idea how many calories I have burned, whether I got a text in the three minutes since I picked up my phone, or what the temperature is outside. It will take me more than two taps to figure out exactly when my next menstrual cycle begins. If you call me and I don’t have my phone on me, I will not be able to answer you by talking to my wrist like Penny in Inspector Gadget.

I am realizing the depth of my addiction to that tiny glass square. Well, the glass was just the vehicle. My real addiction was to quantifying the success of each day based on my move goals and the illusion of constant connectivity.

At this point, I am not sure if I am uncomfortable because I feel so disconnected or if I’m uncomfortable because I have to reckon with being so addicted to machine that monitored my every move.

Either way, this is not how I planned to land post-Labor Day.

I am untethered. I am lost. I am free.

Of course, I am more than my history of shattered Apple products. It’s also the first week of school. And I am suddenly realizing that after eighteen months of certain uncertainty, the prospect of five days a week of school is immensely challenging.

This return to “normal” is what we’ve been yearning for. Why is this so hard?

Sure, there’s the chance that schools will close or either of the kids could be quarantined for weeks. There’s a chance that Covid could be more than a mere inconvenience as we see infections rise in children. It’s hard to get excited about the new routine when a stray cough could bring the whole fragile arrangement crashing down.

I am so dazed and unfocused. I can’t seem to shake the “I need more tea and then some chocolate and then some pretzels before I answer this next email” state of mind.

It’s more than vicarious first day of school jitters, though. 

Instead, I realize it’s immense pressure that comes with “Psst, Mom! It’s finally quiet. Go be outrageously successful and accomplish every single one of the professional and creative things right now so you don’t fail at post-pandemic reentry!”

Back in the old days (like over the weekend), my watch could help me track when anxiety would set my heart racing. I don’t need the heart rate monitor to tell you that there are too many stress hormones in my system right now. (Oh, hey, maybe I’m already learning to live without that device!)

There are too many stress hormones in our collective emotional system right now. While we have a lot to be stressed about, some of that pressure is self-imposed and truly is optional. Like the pressure everyone puts on themselves during new beginning moments, like the end of summer and the return to school.

So, if you’re a parent and are feeling the press of “I should get my business/creative practice/self care routine up to 117% because the kids are finally back where they belong,” I see you. I feel you.

Regardless of whether we have kids in school or are going to class ourselves, September is a chance for many of us to begin again. We can all use a little more self-compassion right now since it’s far from easy to get back into the post-Labor Day routine.

I’m holding hands with all of the writers, creatives, and entrepreneurs who are staring into the next season wondering how on earth you’re going to find the energy, focus, and confidence to get out there and make the next thing.

Here’s what we’ve learned (since March of 2020 and throughout our lifetime as sovereignty seekers, word witches, and all around weirdos):

• The old rules don’t apply any more.

• The old structures cannot support us.

• The old routine can’t be revived in the same old way.

If the timepiece that used to help us make sense of the world cracks, we need to find a new way to navigate our lives. 

In this early September moment if you can’t quite find your center, find your muse, or find your pen, remember this: your lack of inspiration, motivation, or imagination is not the problem.

What if it’s the relentless press to be productive and commodify every free moment that’s the problem? What if it’s the equation of busyness and self-worth? What if we must finally, once and for all, smash the foolish belief that everything is going to feel “normal” again just because we landed on a certain date or reached some artificial milestone?

What if you didn’t have to start today, but you trusted yourself and believed that in your own time, you’d settle into a new cycle of being, making, doing, and creating?

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When it is time to set off on your own creative path — as a writer, as an entrepreneur, as a seeker looking to understand your own story in a new way — I’d love to help.

The Sovereign Writers’ Knot, the new iteration of my online writing community, opens again on September 27.

The Story Illuminations Sessions are a great 1:1 option if you’re trying to figure out just where to start and need to heal some of the old wounds that hold you back from stepping forth on your creative path.

Connect With Your Creative Cycle When the World Turns Upside Down

Cycles. 

Of the moon and stars. Of the seasons. Of the calendar. Of the body.

All of these cycles influence the cycles of creativity. Some of these cycles we can rely upon. Some of the cycles we’ve grown to rely upon are so out of control that they’re utterly unrecognizable. 

I want to call you into an exploration of your own cycles. 

When the world has gone mad and time has ceased to have meaning, you need to find yourself within your own meaningful cycle.

Understanding where you are within a greater pattern will  provide you the structure to continue to be creative. It’s what will help you stay sane. It’s what will help you gather the strength to take appropriate action to put the world to rights.

But first, a bit of context... 

Each Wednesday at noon ET, the Sovereign Writers Circle gathers to write. (By the way, this reliable weekly cycle transforms “I wish I wrote more” laments into “I’m so glad I wrote today” smiles.)

We always begin with a brief meditation or visualization. Then, this community of healers who write and writers who heal begin to put words on the page.

I always offer two prompts that invite creative, emotional, practical, and magical exploration. Sometimes, the writers are asked to respond to the events of the day. Since many of our members are entrepreneurs, we occasionally explore matters of livelihood and how writing can support a business. 

We always wander into the vast territory where heart and mind and imagination meet.

Picture yourself there with the Sovereign Writers Circle this week. This is how we opened our session…

It’s the end of May. We find ourselves on a planet where a year is divided into twelve glorious months, so we get twelve remarkable chances to sum things up and plan anew. 

Leave room for that to matter. Let May - one of the longest, shortest, strangest, scariest months - to have shape and meaning. Or, leave room for another cycle to matter.

We moved through the energy of a New Moon in Gemini last week. I know my heart lifts when I see that first sliver hanging in the evening sky as I water my gardens after a long, unseasonably hot day. 

Be in the sickle cup of the moon as she moves into her first quarter. Remember what you felt when the sky was dark and when the last full moon filled the sky. Imagine what’s coming in the weeks ahead as she waxes and, inevitably, wanes again.  

Maybe the cycles of the Zodiac help shape your experience and your energy. Perhaps you want to write yourself into the stars and find guidance and illumination there. We find ourselves in the sign of the celestial twins right now. This is Gemini Season, the time of creative expression, the time to celebrate the vast, flexible power of the mind. 

It might be time for you to find yourself in the cycles of society (if you can find any that give you comfort). We marked Memorial Day just a few days ago. What does that mean when it comes to the national and social heartbeat? What does a day of remembrance and the unofficial start of summer mean in moments like this? 

Or, maybe you find yourself drawn to the tides of your own body. If you’re a woman who still bleeds, you may feel called to tune into your own menstrual cycle, but our miraculous bodies offer so many other rhythms and beats.

There’s magic in the grand and the subtle cycles constantly being enacted all around you. Be with them and flow with them.

Unless you just can’t.

Perhaps you feel like none of these cycles matter enough, none are palpable enough. It’s a great big, broken world, after all. The heavens seem too far away, the traditional calendar has been rendered meaningless during the pandemic, the social fabric is in tatters, and the murmurs of your own body seem too mundane.  

And so, when none of the existing structures hold you, you can begin at a true beginning. Offer yourself a blank slate, a clear space, a new place to create.

It can feel hard or intensely liberating to feel like you’re starting with nothing. (Maybe you feel like both are true at the same time.)

Try to inhabit the power of the author - of the authority and the Sovereign of your own life. You get to make up the chapter. (You get to acknowledge that we are all being called to start a new chapter. Knowing this early will make the transition into the new normal a wee bit easier.)

And so, as we do before we enter every writing practice (remember, you’re listening in on the prelude to the Wednesday session with the Sovereign Writers Circle), I encourage you:

Deep breath in. Spine straight, fullest extension in your writing chair.

Be in this body. Be grateful for this body and all that she does to hold you as your mind and spirit go on a great adventure. 

And now, let’s write…

Writing Prompt: Find Your Cycle, Find Yourself Within the Cycle

What cycle feels most fertile and familiar to you right now? Write with the moon, the season, the feelings in your own body.

And, if you cannot find immediate truth and solace in one of the many natural and social cycles that give shape to life, embrace that freedom. Trust yourself. Follow your own words until you draft your way into a whole new cycle of meaning and truth. 

Something To Look Forward To

I’ve been quiet lately. Well, my mind hasn’t been quiet, but the words that have been swirling within were in the realm of the “not yet speech ripe.”⁣

(Isn't that a delectable phrase? I learned it from a client who is writing a memoir that blends his relationship with the earth, the realm of dreams, the quest for the divine, and the crazy beauty of the human condition. He received this phrase from his mentor Jeremy Taylor, a leading voice in Projective Dream Work.)
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There’s a good chance you know what I mean, right? It’s been almost impossible to find words to wrap around the enormity of our changing world. And yet, there’s an entire world of ideas to express and explore.⁣
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When everyone is occupied at home and I can give myself permission to step away from the screen with all its competing demands, I get in my car and I point it toward this ridge and I remember that the clouds are the same and the sun is the same and this blue is the same perfect blue of any bright May day.⁣
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That's when I remember: we do not love our earth any less for all that she never puts her beauty into words.⁣
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If your heart is full and your pen is still, remember to forgive yourself.

Trust that the urge will come soon and that you do have so very much to say. We’ll wait until you’re ready. We’ll hear you when it’s time to speak.⁣

Perhaps this writing prompt will help you find the words today...

Writing Prompt: Something To Look Forward To

We hear the word “uncertainty” everywhere right now. It’s attached to conversations of health and mortality. You can’t talk about the economy and livelihood without using the word several times.

It’s important to name something else that’s uncertain: how we’ll celebrate all the traditions and holidays that we “always” look forward to.

To move gracefully into this next season of “maybe we’ll see you,” you’re invited to hold all the conflicting feelings. The grief and the disappointment as well as the optimism, the flexibility, the creative energy required to find and make joy in a season that may not include gatherings and vacations.

How will you consciously create “things to look forward to” in the weeks and months to come?

I offered this writing prompt to the Sovereign Writers Circle last week. If you're seeking a wise, compassionate group of creatives and healers who can help you hold space for your own creative healing powers, please consider joining us. We welcome new members on June 1.

A Writing Prompt for Personal & Creative Integration

There are so many reasons we want to become more conscious, empowered storytellers.

As Jonathan Gottschall tells us in his book The Storytelling Animal, "stories make us human."

When we dedicate ourselves to telling our stories, we dedicate ourselves to our shared humanity.

As I work with the healers and creative entrepreneurs in my Stand In Your Sovereign Story program, I see another reason emerge...

We want to become bolder, braver, more competent storytellers because we need to integrate our gifts, ideas, and experiences.

Transformation professionals are multi-talented and multi-passionate. ("I'm a healer and a coach and an artist and a dancer and a mom, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera.") We need a strong story to help us convey the unique combination of what we have to offer.

This process of integration is important when it comes to formulating a marketing story like we are in the SIYSS program, but it’s even more important for us as creative people trying to figure out how to show up and stay connected in this new strange, splintered reality.

In my other online group, the ongoing community the Sovereign Writers Circle where we focus on in-depth personal writing, I offered up this writing prompt yesterday…

Integration and Weaving the Threads

We know how to tie two threads. We know how to braid three together. Beyond that, working with four, five or more threads? That kind of knot work is beyond the usual skill set.

And yet, you are made of many threads - many passions, abilities, identities, stories.

Spend some time looking at your threads, teasing out the strands and learning which knots seem impossible. Imagine what kind of pattern you could create out of these pieces of you. Imagine that you do have the power to do this kind of weaving because, of course, you do.

Does this inspire your creativity and your desire to weave together your threads of story?

We’re welcoming new members into the Sovereign Writers Circle through May 5.

Apply to join this community of writers who heal and healers who write.

A New Moon Ritual for Sovereignty Seekers

There’s a section in The Sovereignty Knot called Dark Moon Love.

It describes one of the loneliest, most important moments in my marriage:

One dark night, years after the vows were said and the babies born, I stood alone, pressing my face against the bathroom window, looking up and hoping for the impossible. It was a new moon night. There was nothing to see, but I longed to find some measure of comfort in the light I knew I wouldn’t find. I sought confirmation in the shadow…

That particular new moon happened several Aprils ago. Now, our marriage is strong and I know a lot more about what it is to stand Sovereign in a relationship.

On this new moon night in April 2020, the entire world seems to be staring up to the empty sky, hoping to find truth and solace in the shadow.

Here’s the thing… there is confirmation and solace to be found in shadow. We are called to find our way in the dark, to trust our footing, to hold hands, to remember that the sun will rise and the moon will grow full.

And, we’re called to remember that once we get through this dark stretch and come out on the other side and reenter the light, the sun will inevitably set and the moon will invariable wane again.

Dark Moon Wisdom

Elsewhere in the book, I tell the story of encountering the Celtic goddess Morrígan. If ever there was a new moon goddess, this phantom warrior queen of the underworld is one of them.

I was in an Irish cave when, “the Morrígan whispered to me that she knew I had spent a life enamored by the light, with appearances, with the demands of seeing and being seen. She needed me to become as comfortable and nimble in the depths of the otherworld as I was in the spotlight of the everyday.”

My wish for you, sweet Sovereignty seeker, is that you find comfort in the shadows as well as the sunshine. I hope that you can learn to sway beneath an empty sky as surely as you know how to howl to a full harvest moon.

And so, I offer this new moon meditation to you.

We’re called to stand strong under the glory of the sun, taking the throne and wearing the crown, yes, but it’s just as important to lay quietly in the dark, calling in the guides and quietly releasing all that does not serve.

Deepest gratitude to my mentor and teacher, Eleanora Amendolara, the founder of the Sacred Center Mystery School who taught me a version of this meditation many years ago.

And thanks to my clients and members of the Sovereign Writers Circle who inspired me to pull this practice out of my own interior spiritual archives.